2010 Classroom Reflection

It's almost time to go back to school, and I see this as an opportunity to reset and change some structures in my classroom.  But before I dig in to what I'd like to change, I'd like to reflect on my learning, my successes, and my challenges from these first 4 months of teaching.

What I've learned:

• The first year of classroom teaching is HARD for EVERYONE!
• Classroom teaching is not what I imagined it to be...it's been sort of a wake up call
• I'm learning and working through so much about myself, not just about the art of teaching
• I have a need to control that I need to release
• Lesson planning will eventually start to get easier
• Giving kids "choice" is not as black and white as it seems
• Classroom management means more than just controlling the students
• There are many situations on a daily basis where I don't know what to do or how best to handle a situation
• Teaching is really trial and error - keeping what works and getting rid of what doesn't
• I have some AMAZING colleagues 
• First year teachers NEED mentor teachers...it's hard to do this alone
• I'm not going to love every student and every student is not going to love me
• When I can see my students outside of the classroom, it helps me view them as a regular kid instead of just a student
• Building a relationship with my students is important and helpful for us to understand each other
• Kids really do enjoy working in groups, and I need to stop being afraid of letting them do so
• I need to forgive myself for not being able to do it all
• I WILL NOT be the perfect teacher, no matter how hard I try
• I can only do so much.  I can't save the world
• I need to stop being so hard on myself

This list could go on and on, as I've learned so much about myself and teaching this year.  I still have much more to learn as the rest of this year continues, and even more to learn each year when I teach.  The learning never ends!

My Successes:

• I've survived!
• We made a class video using Animoto
• I did all right for my first time ever teaching science
• I'm a chart queen!
• My students are reading and writing for roughly 20 minutes each day
• My class can travel quietly through the all on our way to lunch
• We put on a play
• I've run some small groups
• I've implemented exit cards and used them to keep running records
• I use a checklist daily to assess my students
• My math lessons are improving!
• I've kept the class engaged through an entire chapter book 
• We've practiced giving compliments to others
• I'm improving on always walking around with something to take notes on
• Lesson planning is beginning to get a tad easier

I feel like there are more successes too, but for the length of time and space I'd like to move on.

My Challenges:

• Still struggling with management - knowing how to keep the students engaged, respectful to me and their peers, and dishing out consequences (cuz there really aren't very many to dish out)
• Helping my low students
• Helping students in general while I'm running small groups or conferences (this is a big one)!
• Transitions and unstructured time
• Having homework ready
• Checking homework & time to review it in the morning
• Keeping students on task
• Moving quietly through the hallway after lunch
• A structured bathroom procedure
• The use of materials (pencils mostly)
• Not having so many students out of their seats during instructional time
• Playing games in the classroom
• Making mini lessons and assignment instructions clear enough for students to understand
• Not getting so angry and frustrated with them all the time
• Interventions for behaviors
• How often to communicate with parents, especially with behavior children
• Teaching Social Studies and Science better
• Having kids use more technology
• Not prepping everything at the last minute

So these are some of the challenges I'll be looking to solve for the rest of this school year.  Phew!  That was some good reflecting!  Now I need to get myself into planning and solving mode!

My Educational Values

I have some really great instructional coaches at my school.  Lately, they've been talking about what we value as teachers and how that shows up in our classrooms.  They've also told me personally that they believe I'm not being true to myself, like I'm acting how I think a teacher "should" act or like how other teachers at my school act, but it's not my natural self.  I thought about this a lot the other night and think I finally understand what they mean. So I asked myself, "What do I value as a teacher?" and this is what I came up with:


I believe...

-learning should be fun
-kids need structure
-kids need to be nice to each other
-kids need to develop empathy and compassion for others
-kids learn from each other
-kids need to be explicitly taught and things need to be modeled for them
-kids need to constantly review material in order to master it
-kids should be able to read and write independently
-kids should be able to articulate their thinking
-kids should know how to work cooperatively in groups
-kids should be taught how to help others properly
-kids should be responsible for their materials
-kids should be prepared for the day
-kids should be held accountable for their actions
-kids should feel comfortable and safe in the classroom
-kids should take ownership of their classroom
-kids should see their own work displayed
-kids should be challenged to think critically
-kids should be able to function without me being there
-kids should be treated with respect
-kids should be spoken to in a loving but firm way
-kids should feel loved
-kids should feel proud of their accomplishments
-kids should be able to handle conflicts peacefully
-kids should understand how things work in the real world
-kids should know there are consequences for their actions
-kids should understand that the world does not revolve around them
-kids should know what's happening in the world around them
-kids should reflect on their learning
-kids should share and be kind to one another
-kids should express their creativity
-kids should have dreams
-kids should be prepared to go to college
-kids should feel inspired to learn

I also asked myself, "What kind of teacher am I/What kind of teacher would I like to be?"  This is what I came up with:

I am/I would like to be a teacher who:
-makes her students feel loved
-is excited about learning
-gets her students excited about learning
-can manage a classroom well
-teaches her students how to behave properly
-trusts her students
-loves technology
-loves to read
-wants all of my students to feel successful
-moves my students' levels up
-remains patient in stressful situations
-knows my students very well (academically and personally)
-is taken seriously by my students
-turns my students into hard workers
-continues to learn about my craft and improves
-can celebrate the small things

Some of these qualities I already posses, and some I am still working on.

I think the next step in this reflection is to pick a few of my values to work on each week, then by the end of the year all of my values should be present somewhere in my classroom.

What do you value as an educator?

Awful Day

Today was not a good day at all.  I feel like I'm in crisis mode where if I don't get the class under control, we won't learn anything all year.  I have a wonderful coworker who took me to another school to introduce me to her mentor teacher and we talked for a while.  She even gave me some manipulatives to use with one particular student.  I'm so grateful to have her support, especially when there are some really fake teachers I work with who are waiting and hoping for me to fail.  That's been hard to face, but I'll let God take care of them.

So, what am I going to do tomorrow?  We're going to completely redesign the classroom.  I'll be moving my carpet to a new location so I can move my desks around.  We'll be facing a different board, and I'll be stripping down the class rules to make new ones.  I'm also getting rid of some levels on the behavior chart so the students have less chances and reach more severe consequences quicker.  Basically, I've been told that I have to be a drill sergeant.  It's gonna be a challenge for me but I'm going to do my best.  I'll keep building relationships, but the fun has to be sucked out of the room for now because my kids can't handle having fun.  It's hard to say that but everyone can see they're not ready for fun, and they're not ready for lots of choice. 

I was able to reward my students who are able to make strong choices with fun while those who made poor choices watched the others have fun.  I'm gonna keep working on that...it's just hard when I can only be in one place at one time. 

My head is spinning with so many ideas that are always shared, and I'm overwhelmed.  I feel like I keep changing something everyday, but my kids keep giving me reason to.  For every thing I come up with, they come up with a counter behavior for it.  Somehow someway I have to show them that I'm the boss and I run the show, not them.  *sigh* Let's see how tomorrow goes....

Reflection 1

Just wanted to reflect on my day.  I tried something new where I mapped out the entire day so that I would know everything I wanted to do and in the right order.  I noticed that in my room there is a lot of down time for the kids to get into trouble because I'm not always prepared with what comes next, so I wanted to fix that this week.  It ended up being 4 pages long, just for Monday, but it helped me stay on task and on track.  We even managed to get through all of our subjects, from Morning Meeting to Writing to Reading to Second Step (violence prevention program) to Math to Specials to Science.  So I'm happy that we got through every lesson.  It didn't necessarily change the behavior issues I'm having, but there was more time on task than there was last week.

Another thing I did differently that helped end the day a bit more smoothly was do our class jobs and get ready for dismissal an hour before we actually dismiss.  Since school began, dismissal has been one of the worst parts of my day because it has been so hectic and chaotic, especially with so many parents picking up their kids early.  So today I had us dismiss (pack up our backpacks and whatnot) right after they came back from specials, and then we went into the science lesson and used that to finish the day.  It was much smoother, so I'm going to stick with it.

I also tried to end the day with a final closure where we shared something we learned, but many of the students were mentally checked out so it wasn't as powerful as I had hoped.  I will keep pondering over that.

Let's see...I also got rid of transition time, which was a 2-5 minute period where students could go to their locker or sharpen their pencils.  Most kids took it to mean free time and were just chilling and getting into trouble, so I decided to nix it.  Now I let students sharpen their pencils when they need to and just ask me before they go to their lockers.  It worked pretty well, though the kids were bummed to lose their "free time".

Tomorrow I'm going to talk to them about what types of behaviors will make them move their color (we use a color chart with clothespins).  My only concern is that so many students exhibit those behaviors so frequently throughout the day that it's hard to keep up with and sometimes I have to let certain things go.  I'm nervous that now that these behaviors are written explicitly on a chart they will start to notice that I can't always keep up.  For example, I can't always stop the lesson to tell someone who is talking to move their color because they are ALWAYS talking and I would never get through the lesson.  So I tend to highlight the super disruptive ones who actually interrupt me, but it still feels inconsistent.  I'm not really sure what to do with that.

Last thing, I'm often told that I always need to keep my voice level and not let the children see that they are getting to me.  I find this to be extremely difficult for me because I'm a super transparent person and most people can always read my emotions.  Even today, I got so frustrated that I told the class they were making me angry and I would have to start taking away their PE time if they kept it up.  I just don't know how to hide it...I'm an emotional person by nature and I get irritated by all the misbehaving.  Any advice?

Back to School

After a wonderful and relaxing summer vacation, today I am officially back in the working world.  This week I am attending a summer institute focusing on reading and math.  I have chosen to participate in the new teachers session because this will be my first year as a general education classroom teacher (previously was an ESL teacher for 3 years).  I'm going to teach 3rd grade and I have a mix of emotions that range from excitement to fear.  I am looking forward to the challenges and all the success that I know is to come.

I wanted to get back to my blog, as I have abandoned it pretty much all summer.  I cannot make any promises on the frequency of my updates, as I am not an avid blogger who updates on a consistent basis.  In fact, I'm at the point where I am really blogging more for me than for my audience (sorry folks), but I appreciate those who read and leave comments, especially when sharing personal experiences or offering ideas for my classroom.

Anyhow, I just wanted to give myself a quick reflection of today's training.  I want to push myself to reflect frequently this year on what goes on in my classroom so that I may continue to improve.  Today's session focused on math and the components that make up the math block.  Our presenters modeled many of the activities we would be doing in our classroom and encouraged us to experience them from the perspective of our students.  We started with Morning Meeting (singing songs and everything), then went through most of a math block, participating in the problem of the day, a building number sense activity, the mini-lesson, and reflecting at the end.  What I appreciated about today's session was that it gave me the jolt I needed to get my head back in the game, and the ideas started flowing.

For the past few weeks I've been trying to do some educational reading and planning, but often felt stuck.  I would start but then come to a point where I wasn't sure where to go next.  Being in a room full of teachers once again, and having the instructional coaches take us through a math block modeling and discussing what we noticed was just what I needed to set me in the right direction again.  Tonight, I even came home and watched a few presentations from The Reform Symposium, which sparked some ideas for other activities I'd like to do with my class this year.  I hope this feeling lasts and that it will fuel me during tomorrow's planning sessions so I may map out the first 20 days of school.  Sometimes I bog myself down with planning because I am so detailed and focused on "doing it right".  But that's another topic for another day.  Overall, I left today's session feeling that I have a good understanding of how the math block is structured and what goes in each component of the block, so I can begin to incorporate that into a concrete unit plan tomorrow.

Welcome back to school y'all!